Between love and infatuation
by musicalitycrushed
Summary: Syaoran sits on the side of the cliff where “she” died and thinks about his feelings for two ladies. As he watches the sunset, he goes through a flashback, a memory he hasn't forgotten. Please R&R! SxS one-shot!


**Summary: Syaoran sits on the side of the cliff where "she" died and thinks about his feelings for two ladies. As he watches the sunset, he goes through a flashback, a memory he hasn't forgotten. Please R&R! SxS one-shot!**

**Disclaimer (MUST BE READ!): I do not own cardcaptor Sakura. CLAMP DOES! I Also do not own the IDEA of the story. My friend Crystal does! **

**Author's notes: I hope you guys will like this as well. My friend convinced to make a story of her idea and I gladly accepted it! Remember to review okay? Oh yeah, Meiling and Syaoran ain't cousins in this story kay? Hehe, Enjoy!**

**Warning: You have to read the whole story in order to understand it! Don't review without reading the whole story! **

**Between Love and Infatuation**

**By: Rondallagurl**

**--**

**-At the cliff-**

Syaoran walked to the cliff where "**she**" died and sat down on the soft grass. He just came back from a very important meeting with Eriol Hiiragizawa, one of the most richest man in Asia. "Hiiragizawa enterprises" are brother companies with the "Li enterprises". They have been helping each other ever since the heir's of both companies were born. And not only those heir's are CEO's in their companies, they are cousins and best friends.

Syaoran sighs deeply bringing out a white rose and smelled it. It reminded him of two girls, the girl he fell in love with and the girl he had puppy love with.

**-Flashback/ one year ago when it happened- **

An auburn haired girl walked to the cliff where her boyfriend told her to go to. He told her to wait for him because he had something important to tell. She checked the time sighed and sat down under the cherry blossom tree. He was 15 minutes late!

The emerald eyed beauty hummed the tuned her mother had sung to her when she a child. Oh she had missed her mother. Only when she was three, her mother died. _'__**Okaa-san, I miss you!'**_She thought. Speaking of her, she heard her mothers voice calling her, telling her to go toedge of the cliff. The girl was somehow hypnotized and and started doing what she was told. As she got closer and closer, she could see the figure of her mother with open arms.

She felt like she was about cry when she really did cry. She felt herself fall and hang on to a rock. She screamed her loudest asking for help. **"Help, somebody help me. Please! Help me! Help!"** She screamed and screamed and screamed more when she felt the rock give way and splashed into the water. She struggled to put her head up but was too late when her body no longer could cooperate with her brain and she drowned.

Meanwhile on the cliff was a girl with black hair that was tied in pigtails. She saw what happened and was to shocked to move. She wasn't able to help the auburn haired because she was afraid that she would be the one to drown. She was a coward not a heroine. And so she ran to the street and saw the girls boyfriend and his friend walking towards her.

"**Hey Meiling, have you seen Sakura?**" He asked smiling at the girl he called Meiling.

Unable to talk, Meiling shook her head and just waved goodbye to him. With that she left, not wanting to see Syaoran's reaction when he sees Sakura's body in the water.

Syaoran and Eriol walked to the cliff smiling all the way. He was ready to take Sakura's hand in **marriage and love** her forever. He reached for his pocket where the box of the **ring **was and felt happier when he got closer.

When he reached the cliff, he was surprised that Sakura wasn't there. He thought that she was just later than him until he saw foot prints on the ground that were seen until the edge of the cliff. He looked at Eriol and shook his head. **Fear** spread throughout his body as he walked to edge. He silently prayed that those footprints didn't belong to his beloved blossom.

As he reached the edge and look over to the sea, he cried an anguish cry when he saw her body. Eriol ran to him and saw her body as well.

"**NO, Sakura, Sakura, don't leave me. SAKURA! SAKURA! NO! PLEASE! NO!**" Syaoran cried and cried. He sank to the ground, pressing his hands to his chest where his heart stayed trying to calm it down. But no it wouldn't, and so he cried more screaming for her name.

Eriol was also shocked. One of his good friends, his girlfriends best friend and cousin, was there, her body floating on the sea, not moving. How was he going to tell his girlfriend about her cousin? How will **Tomoyo** react when she hears the news? Eriol shook his head. He should attend to his best friend and cousin first. He called 911 and reported the news to the police.

He went to Syaoran's side and heard Syaoran murmuring: "**If only I was here earlier, this wouldn't have happened. I would have proposed to her and we would get married and have kids. Now none of these will happen because she's dead. SHE'S DEAD ERIOL, SHE'S GONE! Sakura, no please! This is my fault!**" Syaoran hit the ground with is palms and bowed his head. His heart broke into a million pieces and he knew that it will never be mended.

"**Syaoran, this isn't your fault okay? This isn't your fault**!" With that the other man started crying as well.

The police came with rescuers, well more like, people who'll get the body out, and found the two men crying. They wouldn't call those two gay for they also felt very sad for their friend Sakura. They were friends with her because of her brother **Touya**'s best friend, **Yukito**. She had helped them with their own love life problems but they wouldn't be able to give the favor back for she was gone, forever.

They called paramedics to pick up two men whom they have known for quite a long time.

The 'rescuers' went to retrieve her body from the sea while the police helped the two shocked men into the ambulance. Only Eriol spoke when he felt _a little _better while Syaoran only shook his head whether to say no or yes. They were brought to the hospital for check- up's even though it wasn't needed.

A few days after the death of Sakura, Syaoran was now a depressed and cold man. He only spoke when necessary but kept silent all the way.

--

**-Sakura's funeral-**

**Everyone **who knew Sakura went to her funeral. Some spoke of how determined and generous she was when she helped them, other's spoke of how she inspired them in different ways, how good she was as a friend, or how they admired her. Mostly everyone cried when they saw her, lifeless, in the coffin.

Syaoran sat in the corner near his beloveds coffin staring at her face in the biggest picture he had of her. People would walk to him and gave him their condolences but all he would do is nod at them.

_'My dear blossom, I miss you. I'm sorry, sorry for not being there for you. I wish I would have come earlier.'_ He was brought back to reality when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He looked up and saw Meiling smiling a sad smile.

"What do you want Meiling?" He said in a cold tone which made wince.

"I just want to say I'm sorry Syaoran, I know how much you love Sakura, but you have to move on!"

"You're telling me to move on? Move on? How dare you Meiling! I will never move on and I will always love Sakura!" He screamed, trying to fight tears.

"I am just saying you should move on Xiaolang, you must move on! Sakura wouldn't want you to be sad and depressed! Syaoran let his tears fall and Meiling comforted him.

**-At the cemetery-**

They buried Sakura in one of the most nicest, decent and expensive cemeteries. She was very special in Syaoran's heart that he didn't want to see her buried. He stayed in the card, clutching Sakura's picture to his chest.

He then heard a voice, a voice that was familiar to him. He turned but he didn't see anybody. He was frightened at first but when he heard the voice again, he knew that it was Sakura.

"Sakura?"

"Yes, Syaoran?"

"Why'd you leave me?"

"I never left you Syaoran!" Syaoran became confuse. Then he felt a soft yet cold hand touch his chest. "I'm always here in your heart, remember that!"

"Yes, Sakura I will."

"Good, now Syaoran?"

"Yes?"

"Please move on! Don't be sad."

"I will Sakura, just for you!" He felt her smile.

"Syaoran?"

"Yes?"

"I have to go! I Love You!"

"I Love You too, good bye!" Then he felt her kiss his cheek and felt her presence leave. _'Meiling's right, I should move on while still loving Sakura.'_

Eriol came in and stared at Syaoran's face. "Syaoran are you alright? You look like you saw a ghost!"

"I didn't see a ghost Eriol, I saw Sakura, no, I heard her!" Eriol's eyes widened.

"Really?"

"Yes!"

"What did she say?"

"She told me to move on Eriol, she told me herself." They both smiled and Eriol patted Syaoran in the back.

"There you go dude! Speaking of moving on, why don't you court Meiling?"

"Meiling, why her?"

"Cause she's one of the closest women to you aside from Sakura and Tomoyo. Plus, Tomoyo's with me so ding ding, Meiling's the only one available."

They looked at Meiling who was talking to Chiharu and Tomoyo. She looked over to them and smiled. Syaoran and Eriol smiled back.

"I guess so Eriol, I hope she'll be the one!"

"There you go buddy! Now let's get to it!" And they drove to Syaoran's office to talk about business.

--

Three months after Sakura's death, Syaoran was able to become himself again because of Meiling. They have become a couple, and Syaoran started having feelings for her.

'_I think I love her_!' He thought.

'_How do you know?_' A voice spoke. He was talking to himself.

'_I know because I feel it!_'

'_Really?_'

_'Yes!_'

'_Ehem! So okay Xiaolang, answer this question? How much love do you love Sakura and How much love do you love Meiling? Rate both from one to ten!'_

'_Sakura, I'm in love with her to the rate of ten. Meiling, I'm in love with her to the rate of...I don't know?' _

_'You see! Think about it, you may have feelings for Meiling as more than a friend but you love Sakura so much.'_

_'But I really do love Meiling!'_

_'Okay, okay! Yes you do love Meiling, but remember, is it really true love?'_

_'I- who are you anyway?'_

_'I'm your conscience!'_

_'Really?'_

_'Yes!'_

_'Great! Good bye conscience!'_

_'Wait!' _But Syaoran turned off his conscience just like turning of an appliance. Even though he didn't want to listen to his conscience, his conscience was right. _'What am I thinking?'_ Syaoran shook his head and headed to Meiling's house.

When he reached Meiling's house, he knocked on the door and waited for someone to open it. A maid opened the door, she was small and her age was no older than 18. Syaoran pitied her. So young yet Meiling kept ordering her around.

"Good evening Mr. Li!" She greeted.

"Good evening Sheira! Where is your mistress Meiling?" He asked with so much kindness.

"She's up in her room Mr. Li. Shall I call her and tell her that you're already here?"

"Yes Sheira! Thank you!"

"Should I get anything for you?"

"No, thank you Sheira." She smiled and bowed to him disappearing in the stairs.

A few minutes later, he heard a loud 'BANG' then a scream. And the Sheira ran down the stairs looking terrified and hid behind him.

"Sheira you brat! Where are you? If I get my hands on you I will- Oh hi Syaoran!" She turned from evil to sweet when she saw him.

"Meiling, what did you do Sheira?" Syaoran asked holding the young girl to him.

"She broke the vase in my room!" Meiling pouted. Syaoran looked at Sheira and asked her if it was true. Sheira nodded.

"I said I was sorry and I told her that I will repay it with what I earn from her. It would take about one year before everything is paid. Then she started screaming."

"Meiling, she said she'll pay you! Why are you so angry?"

"Because that was one of my favorite vases!"

"Really Meiling? I recall you saying that you wanted to sell that vase but you couldn't because no one would buy it!"

But!"

"No buts, let's go!" Syaoran dragged Meiling to the car. He then went back to her house and told Sheira that he will be the one to pay for the broken and all she could do was thank him. He went back to his car and started driving.

While driving, Syaoran couldn't stop thinking of Sakura. Everything Sakura was, wasn't Meiling. Meiling was a whole lot different than Sakura. Meiling was aggressive when it came to intimacy such as holding hands and hugging. She would get angry immediately when a person would make a mistake and order people around.

Sakura really was different. She was soft and gentle to any person. She would smile when a person makes a mistake and tell them: "Everyone makes mistakes, Everything will be alright!" And that person would beam at her. Instead of ordering people around, she would sometimes do stuff herself.

They went to a fine restaurant and had a great time. During the ride home, Mieling noticed that Syaoran didn't talk much. She knew he was thinking of Sakura. He always thinks about Sakura. Meiling sighed, whether Sakura was alive or dead, Syaoran will still love her.

Syaoran dropped her off and drove off with out a single sign of goodbye.

Meiling frowned and went inside the house. Sheira went to her and gave the check to her. Meiling screamed at the girl and fired her for asking Syaoran to pay it for her.

"How dare you ask Syaoran money?"

"I didn't ask him madame, he offered it to me."

"Enough, I will not tolerate your excuses any more. You're fired. Get out, get out of my house now."

Sheira scrambled to her room and packed all her belongings and immediately ran out of the house. All the other maids didn't know the reason why the youngest left but they knew it was because of their mistress.

"What are you all looking at? GO back to work!" She ordered and all the maids went back to what they were doing.

Meiling went to her room and took a shower. She could feel a presence but ignored it. She turned off the shower and put on a baby blue pajama and a baby blue sando to go with it.

A few hours later, Meiling was still awake, she couldn't sleep because she was guilty. Then she felt the presence again.

"Meiling." She heard a voice. The voice made her shiver.

"Meiling." She heard it again but this time it was louder.

"Meiling." She heard it once again but this time she recognized the voice. It was Sakura's! Her eyes widened but she couldn't see anything. And then she heard the voice again, it was loud and clear.

"Meiling, look what you have done!"

"What have I done Saku?"

"You should have helped me Meiling. Now I'm sorry to say this but, you'll have to face the consequences." The voice spoke gently. It wasn't frightening though. The voice.

"What consequences Saku? Tell me!" Meiling asked, desperate.

"I'm sorry, I can't tell you."

"But Sakura!"

"I'm sorry Meiling, I have to go! Good bye! Take care!"

"But Sakura! Sakura? Sakura?" Meiling felt a kiss on her cheek and felt the presence disappear.

_'What did Sakura mean by consequences? I must tell Syaoran!' _Meiling thought and immediately fell asleep.

--

The nest morning, Meiling knew that Syaoran would be at the cliff because it's Sakura's fourth month death anniversary. When she reached the place, Syaoran was crying.

"Syaoran?" Syaoran looked up and stopped crying. He stood up and encircled Meiling into a hug.

"Yes Meiling?"

"Syaoran, I must tell you something." Syaoran looked at her.

"Syaoran, I was there before Sakura died. I saw her die! I saw her go the cliff and I followed to see if she was okay. She was talking to herself saying something about her mother. Then I heard a voice, and Sakura murmured that it was her mothers. Then I saw I figure, I think it was her mom, then Sakura started running to her. And that's when she fell."

Syaoran looked at her disbelievingly. He was shocked and anger started rising up.

"And you didn't help her?" Syaoran roared now hurting Meiling in the arms. He was shaking her. Hard.

"I couldn't Syaoran! I was afraid that I would be the one to drown. She was asking for help. I'm sorry! I'm sorry!"

"How dare you Meiling! How dare you! You should have though of the consequences! We're over Meiling!" Syaoran dropped her to the ground.

Meiling was shocked. She ran after Syaoran, trying to stop him. He was already across the street opening the door of his car.

"Syaoran, wait!" But Syaoran wouldn't listen. But to his shock, Meiling was bumped by a bus. Syaoran ran out of the car and towards her.

He held her bleeding body and strained his ear to hear what she was saying. All he heard was: "I'm sorry Syaoran!" Then she died.

Syaoran did not say anything. He just held her, staring at her face. He didn't listen to the people who were talking. A few minutes later. The police came. They didn't handcuff Syaoran because the passengers said that the bus driver hit her. So the police arrested the bus driver and one of them drove the bus.

That was when Syaoran knew how he felt for Meiling. It was only infatuation. He felt guilty. He felt guilty for loving Meiling with only puppy love.

And that was also when he learned the true meaning of love.

When I think of my love for you  
the wonder of its beauty takes my breath away.  
I cannot recall the moment in time it began,  
but only the overwhelming feeling of ecstasy it brought to me.

For at that moment I knew happiness.  
A happiness I had never known before.  
For just the thought of you gave me joy beyond belief.

The thought of being with you and being held by you was my one desire  
I knew once we first met none other would ever do,  
for I knew love.

I knew love as I had never thought possible in this life time.  
It is a love of passion and desire.  
It is a never-ending need to you,  
for you, only you.

When I think of my love for you  
I realize I now know the true meaning of love.  
I will love you as long as this life endures and beyond,  
for you are my dreams, my realities.  
You are my heart  
You are my meaning of true love.

**-End of flashback-**

--

Syaoran stood up for it was already dark. The sunset was over and it was time for him to go home. He kissed the rose good bye and threw it to the water.

"My dear Sakura, I will always love you! As for Meiling, I'm sorry for loving you!"

Syaoran left and slept peacefully in his home.

**-The rose-**

Sakura: I will always love you as well Syaoran!"

**The End**

--

**Hi guys! Thanks for reading! I hope you liked it! Now please review!**

**Words: 3432**

**Pages: 8**

**Buh- bye!**

**Rondallagurl... **


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